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  1. Replies
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    Because it's there. 37144.

    Because it's there.

    37144.
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    I think we've had enough of these mo-fo-king bees...

    I think we've had enough of these mo-fo-king bees on this mo-fo-king thread. Time to bumble on.
  3. Replies
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    Calm down dear.

    Calm down dear.
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    Flockstars on ITV

    My god, is anyone else watching this ??

    Alan Partridge is a genius, it won't be long now until we see Monkey Tennis.
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    Sorry mate. Brucey is staying where he is. ...

    Sorry mate. Brucey is staying where he is.

    Talking of Bruceys - today Bruce Dickinson off of Iron Maiden flew over Moorfield Towers in a triplane.

    No I am not making this up.
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    Today a Vulcan bomber flew right over Moorfield...

    Today a Vulcan bomber flew right over Moorfield Towers.

    Then I watched H from Steps in a yellow leotard shoot 40/40 on Tumble dancing to Bonnie Tyler.

    Life does not get better than this.

    The...
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    Based on the following scientific analysis, 1-1....

    Based on the following scientific analysis, 1-1.

    1. Joe Hart was bricking himself in the tunnel, but his Head & Shoulders wash looked good.

    2. The Italian national anthem was a bit gay.
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    I like to toast my waffles, a lovely breakfast...

    I like to toast my waffles, a lovely breakfast treat.
  9. 300 objects scattered over a wide area of ocean

    Three things:

    1. 300 objects scattered over a wide area of ocean says to me "explosion" rather than "plane hits ocean at speed and promptly sinks rapidly" - does it not? I am not a pilot, but I...
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    22348 :wave:

    22348

    :wave:
  11. servicing the office m*lf on your last day of...

    servicing the office m*lf on your last day of permiedom leaving drinks and explaining this away as "i fell asleep on the last train and woke up at kings lynn"
  12. Thread: word chain 2

    by moorfield
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    31,197

    fraks

    fraks
  13. Poll: The new series of Pope Idol starts today

    Who's gonna win it then ?
  14. What's the etiquette when passing soap in the showers ?

    Does one bend over to the left, or to the right ?
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    9.35pm Chris should have had his first DRE...

    9.35pm

    Chris should have had his first DRE done by now ... :eek:

    What a pity the pair haven't been locked up together in the same cell.
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    Mission Accomplished

    Skilled up. Quit Permieland. Fired up the Quattro Ltd and moving on. I won't bore you with the tedious details.

    What's been goin' on here ?

    Cheers
    M
  17. Replies
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    "An expert in banking IT systems" is going to...

    "An expert in banking IT systems" is going to explain all on Channel 4 news at 7.30pm !
  18. Replies
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    52,253

    This is what happened: Bob was asked to put a...

    This is what happened:

    Bob was asked to put a fix into their GL end of day for last weeks Swedish bank holiday.
    No one really knows how this bank holiday is meant to work or whether it is...
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    Marathon Un-JustGiving

    So a work colleague bombed out of the marathon after 7 or so miles today.

    What's the form here. Should I recall my sponsorship, or least a pro-rata amount? After all, he hasn't delivered.
  20. Replies
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    He hid it in the one place he knew he could hide...

    He hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something.

    Five long years.
  21. Replies
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    Having worked in IBs for many years I often come...

    Having worked in IBs for many years I often come across

    Bond jamesBond = new Bond() etc. etc.

    probably all written by the same obviously hilarious fwit.

    :tired
  22. Thread: Oops!

    by moorfield
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    Where's the youtube linky ?

    Where's the youtube linky ?
  23. Replies
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    Poll: Currently docked in perm harbour. Nice easy...

    Currently docked in perm harbour.

    Nice easy life, no complaints, lots of WFH.

    My boss got sacked a while ago. :laugh

    Even managed to get my nads checked out by Bupa for free. Which was nice.
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    Bingo! The words "IR35" and "IT Consultants"...

    Bingo!

    The words "IR35" and "IT Consultants" have just been mentioned on Newsnight.

    Even Maitlis is whinging that it's "not fair".
  25. Got my eye on one of these...

    Got my eye on
    one of these.
  26. Replies
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    Currently docked safely in permieland port...

    Currently docked safely in permieland port waiting for my 10% salary increase/bonus coming next month. Sacking off tomorrow and maybe Monday with man-flu.

    :wave:
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    This is about Merkozys re-election campaign....

    This is about Merkozys re-election campaign. Nothing more to see here, move along.

    Whether we are AAA, AA+ or whatever is irrelevant. What only matters is we can never be called Beef Eating...
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    IMO wanking preference shares are oversold now -...

    IMO wanking preference shares are oversold now - bargains to be had.

    PS. Why is "wanking" not converted to "tuliping" ? :confused:
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    John Terry probably knows the truth, ask him. ...

    John Terry probably knows the truth, ask him.

    :igmc:
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    +1 (And I hope Charlie Gilmour is watching...

    +1

    (And I hope Charlie Gilmour is watching this in shame from his dirty prison cell right now.)
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    The IBs (or at least the one I work at) aren't...

    The IBs (or at least the one I work at) aren't touching CDSs on Greece or Italy or suchlike with a bargepole their risk bods won't allow it. Contrary to many I don't see them as "evil" financial...
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    Not that particular one no. But similar family...

    Not that particular one no. But similar family tensions due to my father in law's incontinent sh***ing dog regularly leaving turds on my carpets on Christmas mornings. Thankfully it is now departed....
  33. Thread: Got him!

    by moorfield
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    Lord Lucan wins again. ...

    Lord Lucan wins again.

    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/3/33/Lord_Lucan.jpg/220px-Lord_Lucan.jpg
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    ID Fraud - who can I complain to?

    Just be contacted by an online retailer telling me some pikey has opened an account on credit in my name, fortunately they spotted and cancelled and informed me, but not without pikey getting some...
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    :spel shagging a mother and both her daughters...

    :spel

    shagging a mother and both her daughters


    Alan Clark IIRC. You have to give him some respect for managing that.
  36. Replies
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    Liam Fox's "mate"

    Everyone's thinking it ... who's going to be the first to ask the question ?

    Torygraph have come closest so far ...

    ;)
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    http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lq3whtD7tB1qbf05e.j...

    http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lq3whtD7tB1qbf05e.jpg

    Gromit, that's it! Cheese! We'll go somewhere where there's cheese!
  38. Replies
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    I'm with Prof Jim Al Khalil on this one. If...

    I'm with Prof Jim Al Khalil on this one.

    If it's true I'll eat my boxer shorts live on national TV. Also, if it is true, we would have already read about it in next Wednesday's papers.
    ...
  39. Replies
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    This is the one I think. No no no ! ...

    This is the one I think. No no no !


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tetk_ayO1x4
  40. That's the one. I can't be bothered to copy /...

    That's the one. I can't be bothered to copy / paste verbatim but basically it reads "If we think we might go tits up we are going to convert you and that nice fat cash surplus you've given us onto a...
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    I note it is a Wednesday. Usually they do this on...

    I note it is a Wednesday. Usually they do this on a Friday or a Monday but even they have the requisite number of brain cells to realize that might make them look like lazy slackers. :rolleyes:
  42. What to do with an offset mortgage from a Spanish bank

    I got round to reading the smallprint of my offset mortgage on my train home.

    It's all coming out tomorrow and being shunted into cash, linkers, gold whatever before they change the rules on me.
  43. Replies
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    7061 Hello again BP. It's been a while. ...

    7061

    Hello again BP. It's been a while.

    :wave:
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    Midlife Crisis Celebration

    I have stupidly just agreed to do next years C2C cycle event with a few Uni mates to celebrate THAT birthday milestone.

    What am I letting myself in for ? And should I wear lycra ?
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    Outdoor jobs pending the onset of autumn. I have...

    Outdoor jobs pending the onset of autumn. I have a drainage problem in the lower field I need to sort out tomorrow.

    By the way BP, nice to see you back. I don't visit so often now, but then again...
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    Gadaffi vs. McCann Who's going to win this...

    Gadaffi vs. McCann

    Who's going to win this year ?
  47. Thread: The French

    by moorfield
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    Indeed it has been. I have been enjoying my...

    Indeed it has been. I have been enjoying my annual horse meat fest. Back to the office on Monday. :eek:
  48. I've been away. Apparently the chavs have been rioting.

    Evening All.

    :wave:

    Wot's going on in the UK then ?

    :confused:
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    Croydon is burning!

    I just can't resist playing this at full volume.

    :music:


    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQkActP-isE
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    Do you reckon the same lot that did Dr David...

    Do you reckon the same lot that did Dr David Kelly did him? :glasses
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