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  1. Now here is a person that appreciates his furry friends

    https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/07/07/26866236-8191475-This_squirrel_gets_to_enjoy_a_comfortable_seat_while_it_feasts_o-a-1_1586241456576.jpg


    ...
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    Sticky: Nice try number 32 is still pursuing the indecent...

    Nice try number 32 is still pursuing the indecent exposure complaint.
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    its Trump.

    its Trump.
  4. Not far off the figures I saw for a large US...

    Not far off the figures I saw for a large US multinational a few years ago. They wanted us to be so excited when they started building a huge India office, 5 years later half of IT was off-shored.
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    Sticky: Allegedly your local pharmacy should be able to...

    Allegedly your local pharmacy should be able to help.

    It does seem odd how the NHS fail to recover medicines and medical devices when someone passes away. My FIL had a number of items (wheelchair,...
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    Indeed there seems to be a link between those...

    Indeed there seems to be a link between those that are abused and those that then abuse, disgusting as the crimes are, the solution may be understanding and treating the cause.
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    just be careful with sheep!

    just be careful with sheep!
  8. yep your suppliers need a DR plan as well!

    yep your suppliers need a DR plan as well!
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    They say you cant fix stupid. It seems you...

    They say you cant fix stupid.

    It seems you can't quarantine it either.
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    in which case there is no problem apart from your...

    in which case there is no problem apart from your smilie infection, that is a nasty case you have.
  11. sad cause but boo fecking hoo!

    sad cause but


    boo fecking hoo!
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    You want to set an alarm for HWMBO?

    You want to set an alarm for HWMBO?
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    yep but with corona virus instead of smallpox etc.

    yep but with corona virus instead of smallpox etc.
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    One hopes they release the recipe and we make it...

    One hopes they release the recipe and we make it here, maybe once we have made enough for ourselves we can send the the excess as a thank-you, I doubt they will be able make 2 billion doses in time...
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    "(take) Action Man" the replacement for Magic...

    "(take) Action Man" the replacement for Magic Grandpa and slightly less deranged.
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    ah that is why you have so many exes?

    ah that is why you have so many exes?
  17. Thread: Titcam's back!

    by vetran
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    Just fantasise about MF's moobs...

    Just fantasise about MF's moobs...
  18. Thread: Transport

    by vetran
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    only if you aren't an excluded organisation :grin

    only if you aren't an excluded organisation :grin
  19. Thread: Transport

    by vetran
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    its just data so it an be automated just like...

    its just data so it an be automated just like speeding fines.
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    Sticky: because the women wouldn't shut up and let us...

    because the women wouldn't shut up and let us concentrate?
  21. Thread: Transport

    by vetran
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    eventually being T+3 i.e. 4 working days. Your...

    eventually being T+3 i.e. 4 working days.

    Your guide to contactless card payments | emerchantpay

    We don't need to stop the transaction we just need to register it and then send a fine a...
  22. hmm can anyone see a pattern developing and MM's...

    hmm can anyone see a pattern developing and MM's preferences being clearer?
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    Sticky: FTFY

    FTFY
  24. Thread: Transport

    by vetran
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    So my bank doesn't get a feed of the transactions...

    So my bank doesn't get a feed of the transactions to add them to my bank statement? The credit card company can link the transaction back to the POS terminal?

    Strange because when I ask them they...
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    Sticky: FTFY

    FTFY
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    staying up all Millenia to get lucky!

    Prehistoric pair of fornicating flies that became frozen in amber 41 million years ago discovered | Daily Mail Online
    ...
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    Sticky: no wonder he doesn't have the strength to recycle...

    no wonder he doesn't have the strength to recycle the bottles after all that spanking..
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    Sticky: extra protein!

    extra protein!
  29. Thread: Zoooooom!

    by vetran
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    or pay for a 'secure one'.

    or pay for a 'secure one'.
  30. :hug:

    :hug: <- virtual
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    This keeping two metres apart is absolutely...

    This keeping two metres apart is absolutely ridiculous.

    I've just moved the electric meter away from the gas meter and now I've got no ******* power.
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    for WTFH I can't believe I'm in isolation with...

    for WTFH

    I can't believe I'm in isolation with this coronavirus, and to make matters worse, my wife has just told me she's pregnant.



    So be careful fella's, this virus obviously reverses...
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    for NLUK Meatloaf is getting married again....

    for NLUK

    Meatloaf is getting married again. He's engaged to his accountant.


    Apparently she'll do anything for love, but she won't do VAT.
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    cccThe Day is now divided into two halves......

    cccThe Day is now divided into two halves...
    First half Caffeine.
    Second half Alcohol.
    There are no other rules.The Day is now divided into two halves...First half Caffeine.Second half...
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    I was shagging the wife at 8pm. Goin...

    I was shagging the wife at 8pm.





    Goin at it like the clappers.
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    There still seems to be a lot of confusion about...

    There still seems to be a lot of confusion about this new virus.

    Most people don't know their SARS from their EBOLA.
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    "Feel like trying some watersports tonight?"...

    "Feel like trying some watersports tonight?" asked my wife, grinning.

    "Ok," I replied. "If urine the mood."
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    Well poor old Prince Charles has tested positive...

    Well poor old Prince Charles has tested positive for COVID -19.
    Sorry Charles, but you would insist on shagging an old bat.
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    If BT want to improve the nation's broadband...

    If BT want to improve the nation's broadband speed why don't they just send me round a hooker every night
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    Prince Charles has tested positive for...

    Prince Charles has tested positive for Coronavirus, but reassures us, he’s in good spirits.

    OK for some, the rest of us have to make do with cheap disinfectant.
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    There's only so long before watching porn and...

    There's only so long before watching porn and wanking becomes boring.
    But I'll give it a few more years.
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    I ordered a chinese there, wee chinese driver...

    I ordered a chinese there, wee chinese driver comes to the door and I walked out to meet him. The chap then started shouting "isolate isolate". I said "Mate your'e not that late, I only ordered 10...
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    Whoever said one person can't change the world...

    Whoever said one person can't change the world never ate an undercooked bat
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    Prince William: "Hi Harry. Dad has COVID-19."...

    Prince William: "Hi Harry. Dad has COVID-19."
    Prince Harry: "Yours might have."
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    I was trying to figure out why I was so grumpy....

    I was trying to figure out why I was so grumpy.
    Then I realized, I'm stuck in a house with a newborn, a toddler and a postnatal wife.
    And my Scotch is running low.
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    More unexpected bonuses have come from the...

    More unexpected bonuses have come from the coronavirus pandemic-now nobody give a flying **** what's happening on love island!
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    With all the Covid-19 problems around the world...

    With all the Covid-19 problems around the world my wife broke down in tears today.I said “come one love - what’s up”“I’m homesick” she replied“But this is your home” I said“I know” she said, “I’m...
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    Well I've done my bit but I doubt I'll get thanks...

    Well I've done my bit but I doubt I'll get thanks for it ..

    I gave nan's carer the clap at 8 pm tonight.
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    Thank you Pandemic. I can keep a packet of...

    Thank you Pandemic.

    I can keep a packet of baby wipes next to the computer and nobody suspects a thing
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    During this virus lockdown I'm bored, so I...

    During this virus lockdown I'm bored, so I decided to hold a wet t-shirt contest.



    Looking at them hanging on the line, I've decided I like my red one the best.
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