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  1. Replies
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    Yeah, I've a flight with EasyJet booked for end...

    Yeah, I've a flight with EasyJet booked for end of June... :ohwell
  2. I'll pay you twenty of your English pounds. For...

    I'll pay you twenty of your English pounds. For all 5.
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    338

    Working 3 days rather than 5 would be better.

    Working 3 days rather than 5 would be better.
  4. Replies
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    I'm still blaming it on the boogie. :music:

    I'm still blaming it on the boogie. :music:
  5. Replies
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    That's right. 5g causes 'flu like symptoms, so...

    That's right. 5g causes 'flu like symptoms, so you get "tested" and given the disease.
  6. Not the case. Proof here...

    Not the case. Proof here.
  7. So one on standby for Bozzer.

    So one on standby for Bozzer.
  8. That's how it works in Russia, for sure.

    That's how it works in Russia, for sure.
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    So in ten years time Remainers will blaming the...

    So in ten years time Remainers will blaming the economic collapse on Brexit, and Brexiters will be blaming it on Covid-19.
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    Starting with cures that date back to the Black...

    Starting with cures that date back to the Black Death.


    Moving on to that it's all a hoax and gargling Bicarb of Soda will fix things

    All the way to "Don't get the test. It contains the...
  11. Replies
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    1,560

    Real life example. Michael Buerk reporting the...

    Real life example. Michael Buerk reporting the Ethiopian famine in 1980. He's a bit of a hero there apparently.
  12. Replies
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    1,560

    Reminds me a of a manager complaining that every...

    Reminds me a of a manager complaining that every time he went for coffee, my team was there. Funny that. Every time we went for coffee, he'd turn up a few minutes later. I think he was lonely.
  13. Replies
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    It's what the offshore companies do. 100 workers...

    It's what the offshore companies do. 100 workers filling 400 FTE roles. Which is why they push back at every opportunity, and they have at least 24 hour response times.

    I've only every worked once...
  14. Replies
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    Correct.

    Correct.
  15. If RT ever tell the truth, it's only by accident....

    If RT ever tell the truth, it's only by accident. Certainly not by design.
  16. A membrane oxygenator might help. That infuses...

    A membrane oxygenator might help. That infuses your blood with oxygen and removes co2.
  17. Replies
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    What, one of these?...

    What, one of these?
    https://cdn.weasyl.com/static/media/81/fb/5d/81fb5d4e84b76f9e03aaaaa70538d8bb97083f470937cfa2d5255596f14df1c4.png
  18. Replies
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    174,026

    No one is ever bored enough to read p94.

    No one is ever bored enough to read p94.
  19. Replies
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    94! Private Eye will have something to say...

    94!

    Private Eye will have something to say about that.
  20. Have your man speak to my man.

    Have your man speak to my man.
  21. @NLUK - just walk away. Nothing to see... ...

    @NLUK - just walk away. Nothing to see...



    So, you don't know what an umbrella only contract entails. You don't know what "inside" entails.

    Tell me, how long were with your former client...
  22. Actual TCO in bold including rework, value added...

    Actual TCO in bold including rework, value added etc.
  23. Replies
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    286

    Well, I did ban one of them. I was going to...

    Well, I did ban one of them.

    I was going to edit the thread title. Just to see if he'd notice. Too late now.
  24. Replies
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    It's about minimising risk, not eliminating it....

    It's about minimising risk, not eliminating it. And about ensuring that you're electable after this is over... :ohwell
  25. Replies
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    9,226

    If someone is dying in pain due to a doctor...

    If someone is dying in pain due to a doctor worried that they'll be addicted, then the doctor isn't following good clinical practice. There is absolutely no reason not to give pain relief to...
  26. Replies
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    Well, you never see them posting at the same...

    Well, you never see them posting at the same time...
  27. Can't help but feel a bit of schadenfreude....

    Can't help but feel a bit of schadenfreude. Rather like when Satyam collapsed and senior managers were flapping around asking "who owns our data?". Happy days.
  28. Replies
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    That's what MD in Private Eye said a few weeks...

    That's what MD in Private Eye said a few weeks ago. It especially applies to older people. Those over 70 who need intubation most likely won't make it even in the best of times. He say he'd opt for...
  29. Replies
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    There were also cases of swine-flu infecting...

    There were also cases of swine-flu infecting dogs.

    When you've got millions of cases, you'll get some rare things happening such as a cat testing positive.

    It's only a problem for humans if...
  30. Replies
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    "Release the recipe" :rollin: Chloroquinine is...

    "Release the recipe" :rollin:

    Chloroquinine is out of patent. It is available generically. All you need to make it are production facilities. Novartis has commited to donating 130 million doses....
  31. Replies
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    Sticky: MarkyMark For behaving like MarkyMark. 1 Day...

    MarkyMark

    For behaving like MarkyMark. 1 Day to cool off a bit.
  32. Replies
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    Now we're back to zombies.

    Now we're back to zombies.
  33. Replies
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    1,372

    There's some evidence that having had the BCG...

    There's some evidence that having had the BCG offers a level of protection against respiratory viruses.

    Can an Old Vaccine Stop the New Coronavirus? - The New York Times

    Trigger warning:...
  34. Replies
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    I couldn't care less about your intention. You...

    I couldn't care less about your intention. You post unsubstantiated crap, and I'll socially isolate you for a day or so.

    The same might happen if I find you too annoying.
  35. Replies
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    It is important to know whether it is true. The...

    It is important to know whether it is true. The data suggests it isn't. "Hard to see" is scientist-speak for "unlikely". Science isn't definite. There's an extremely small chance that lying under...
  36. That reminds me - I must issue my March invoice....

    That reminds me - I must issue my March invoice. And chase up January and February.
  37. Replies
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    Also some lucky people might have been exposed to...

    Also some lucky people might have been exposed to a virus with similar enough proteins to confer immunity. There are so many viruses out there.
  38. Replies
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    Yes. Fake news causes unnecessary fear and...

    Yes.
    Fake news causes unnecessary fear and distress to the gullible and hard of thinking - fake news such as saying "if you and your family are all infected, you must stay away from each other"
    ...
  39. Replies
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    The original quote is full of twaddle. This...

    The original quote is full of twaddle.

    This should have been your first indicator that what was to follow need to be treated with extreme skepticism."A medical doctor". Where? When? What makes him...
  40. Replies
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    Your knowledge is incorrect. If you catch a cold...

    Your knowledge is incorrect. If you catch a cold caused by a specific coronavirus, you are immune to that virus until/unless it mutates significantly, so usually several years at least. However,...
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    Full story here: Finding peace in a life sold for...

    Full story here: Finding peace in a life sold for $2

    But nowadays we have laws against such things.
  42. Replies
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    Rich people stay rich by not spending money...

    Rich people stay rich by not spending money unnecessarily. Aldi and Lidl quality is fine. As good as Waitrose, if not better, just not so prettily packed. (And more poor people...).
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    It wouldn't work. The doctor would say "But she's...

    It wouldn't work. The doctor would say "But she's too young and beautiful", and reach for the Tipex.
  44. Replies
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    Yes, I think he has been on it.

    Yes, I think he has been on it.
  45. Replies
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    I'm hoarding them, but you can have some. Though...

    I'm hoarding them, but you can have some.
    Though why he should shove a false dichotomy up his donkey rather than his arse, I don't quite follow.
  46. Replies
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    I got some creosote for defence and degate.

    I got some creosote for defence and degate.
  47. Replies
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    That was Eddie Large!

    That was Eddie Large!
  48. Replies
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    General discussion about counting your covid-19...

    General discussion about counting your covid-19 dead shifted here: https://www.contractoruk.com/forums/general/137704-covid-19-cause-death.html
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    Split from Dead Celebrities thread.

    Split from Dead Celebrities thread.
  50. There are some decent people and managers in the...

    There are some decent people and managers in the public sector, but it does attract a lot of loonies. People who are able to work outside the public sector usually do.
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