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  1. There is salary sacrifice but not sure how much...

    There is salary sacrifice but not sure how much in % terms it applies.
  2. Replies
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    A man walks into a pub with a roll of tarmac...

    A man walks into a pub with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says
    "A pint please, and one for the road."
  3. Replies
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    My book on horology has finally arrived. It’s...

    My book on horology has finally arrived.

    It’s about time!
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    1,577

    Opera - the inbuilt VPN is really handy.

    Opera - the inbuilt VPN is really handy.
  5. Thread: Payeworx

    by Grasser73
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    1,347

    Never trust anyone who cannot even spell 'losing'.

    Never trust anyone who cannot even spell 'losing'.
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    I'm also subject to my first ever furlough in 20...

    I'm also subject to my first ever furlough in 20 years but was aware of the term and its consequence.
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    Got my eyes tested today and told the doctor I...

    Got my eyes tested today and told the doctor I could see into next year...

    He said I had 2020 vision.
  8. You will when you find them taxed at PAYE rates...

    You will when you find them taxed at PAYE rates AFTER already paying Corp Tax.
  9. Replies
    3
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    818

    Client Bucking the Trend

    Just received this today, certainly more optimistic than I was expecting:

    ...
    The team are still looking at the findings from the completed questionnaires and currently ClientCo are...
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    6,577

    There was a Herman Hamburger (yes, he was German)...

    There was a Herman Hamburger (yes, he was German) where I worked in the 80's. The juvenile in me always sniggered when he was paged over the tannoy.
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    I would definitely hold-off on another wife. :wink

    I would definitely hold-off on another wife. :wink
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    Have gone all 70's retro and rediscovered T.Rex....

    Have gone all 70's retro and rediscovered T.Rex. Electric Warrior & The Slider are on rotation

    YouTube Mambo Sun

    YouTube Monolith

    YouTube Mystic Lady
  13. A friend of mine was texting a potential mate and...

    A friend of mine was texting a potential mate and sent him a text proclaiming that she could offer 'all the puppy he could handle'. It should have read pussy of course and funnily enough she never...
  14. I take divis upto the higher rate limit and make...

    I take divis upto the higher rate limit and make hefty pension contribs. I like to start each new financial year with the absolute minimum in the company account.
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    Fettling the latest addition to my garage - a...

    Fettling the latest addition to my garage - a Yamaha xt600 flat tracker
  16. Replies
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    Kim Shattuck

    Kim Shattuck (56) of LA pop/punk band The Muffs, one of my 90's/00's favourites.
  17. Replies
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    159,267

    R.I.P Barrie, a great singer and frontman. Do...

    R.I.P Barrie, a great singer and frontman.

    Do Anything you Wanna do is one of the best from 1977 and a real favourite of mine. I met him when they played in Southampton a few years ago and he was...
  18. Replies
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    Cannot believe that I've just read that! HMRC...

    Cannot believe that I've just read that!

    HMRC are going to love you....hope you have plenty of lube :wink
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    Surely there won't be a significant market left...

    Surely there won't be a significant market left to pick up so no longer a concern.
  20. Well, he did say he likes his lunch. :wink

    Well, he did say he likes his lunch. :wink
  21. Replies
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    Hyperion/Essbase/BI - not my area at all and no...

    Hyperion/Essbase/BI - not my area at all and no idea whether it's niche or commonplace.
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    My worst was 9 months in 2008 but that wasn't all...

    My worst was 9 months in 2008 but that wasn't all that unusual then. A good mate of mine is currently at 11 months but adamant that a £650pd opportunity will come to him!
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    Absolutely agree, there's no chance of opening a...

    Absolutely agree, there's no chance of opening a powershell or even a console on this PC at clientco, it's locked-down tighter than a camel's arse in a sandstorm.
  24. Replies
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    Had a meeting with reps of the...

    Had a meeting with reps of the Agency/Client/Orange Genie triumvirate yesterday. ClientCo are as exasperated as anyone about the changes but are 'committed to using contractors' (over 300) and...
  25. Replies
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    15,709

    Is that prior contracts with that client only or...

    Is that prior contracts with that client only or all contracts period though?
  26. Replies
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    15,709

    Got this email from ClientCo today. What we...

    Got this email from ClientCo today.

    What we are doing?

    We are working hard to ensure we have the necessary processes and support in place to implement these changes as soon as possible. We need...
  27. Replies
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    Hindu, Muslim & Scouser go to Madrid for the...

    Hindu, Muslim & Scouser go to Madrid for the final. Apartment owner meets them to let them in... there are only 2 beds.. guy says I have a barn down the road, one of you is welcome to stay there ..”...
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    There are plenty just down the road at IBM in...

    There are plenty just down the road at IBM in Hursley. They don't pay the best rates so maybe look in that direction.
  29. Replies
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    The police came my door last night and said, 'Are...

    The police came my door last night and said, 'Are you familiar with the letters HB'?
    I said, 'No I'm not'
    'How about LS'?
    'No'
    'What about JD'?
    I said, hang on a minute, am I a suspect or...
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    Not a problem, have hired various vehicles...

    Not a problem, have hired various vehicles without requiring any other ID. (The license is looking the worse for wear after 35 years though).
  31. Replies
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    Janet Street Porter goes into a bar and asks the...

    Janet Street Porter goes into a bar and asks the barman "Can I get a large aperitif?"

    Barman says, "I doubt it"
  32. Replies
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    Two Irishmen flew to Canada on a hunting trip....

    Two Irishmen flew to Canada on a hunting trip. They chartered a small plane to take them into the Rockies for a week hunting moose.

    They managed to bag 6. As they were loading the plane to return,...
  33. Replies
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    You're mixing your Monkees there! Mike Nesmith is...

    You're mixing your Monkees there! Mike Nesmith is the Tippex heir.
  34. Replies
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    Yes. :wave::

    Yes. :wave::
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    More Samantha Fish, covering American Girl. I'm...

    More Samantha Fish, covering American Girl. I'm sure Tom Petty would have approved.

    American Girl
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    Yes, as Cojak said, this was presaged prior to...

    Yes, as Cojak said, this was presaged prior to implementation. The term 'sitting ducks' was never more appropriate.
  37. The ability to spell 'lose'?

    The ability to spell 'lose'?
  38. Replies
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    Kick ass swamp-blues played by a hot babe -...

    Kick ass swamp-blues played by a hot babe - what's not to like?

    Samantha Fish - Runaway

    Samantha Fish - Gone For Good
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    "Have you ever seen £20 all crumpled up"...? The...

    "Have you ever seen £20 all crumpled up"...? The woman asked her husband...
    "No"... Said her husband...
    She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned her blouse and slowly reached down into her bra...
  40. Replies
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    The waitress noticed me struggling to open the...

    The waitress noticed me struggling to open the mini cornflakes packet in the breakfast buffet.
    "Just slide your finger between the flaps", she suggested.
    It finished badly. My face still stings and...
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    2,363

    Live in semi-urban Hampshire, work in rural...

    Live in semi-urban Hampshire, work in rural Hampshire.
  42. Seconded. Best £3k I ever spent.

    Seconded. Best £3k I ever spent.
  43. Replies
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    It's anti-Muslim but I fail to see it as racist...

    It's anti-Muslim but I fail to see it as racist when Islam isn't a race.
  44. Replies
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    The OP has it easy only having to show a...

    The OP has it easy only having to show a passport. The fun starts when, if like me, you don't have one, or indeed any, photo ID.
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    Never heard of that. Which parts?

    Never heard of that. Which parts?
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    I'd imagine adrenalin takes over and you do...

    I'd imagine adrenalin takes over and you do whatever is necessary. If anyone enters my house illegally, I'd like to think they will leave it maimed at best and in a box at worst.
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    I went to bed with a blind girl last night, and...

    I went to bed with a blind girl last night, and she said I had the biggest dick she'd ever laid her hands on

    I said "You're pulling my leg"
  48. I did the course 3 years ago for doing 34. So...

    I did the course 3 years ago for doing 34. So unless things have changed it's not.
  49. Or get a motorbike and laugh in the face of...

    Or get a motorbike and laugh in the face of forward-facing cameras.
  50. Replies
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    Aussie punk, can't decide if it's ironic or not...

    Aussie punk, can't decide if it's ironic or not though.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j58V2vC9EPc&list=RDMMj58V2vC9EPc
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