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ChimpMaster
30th December 2016, 19:35
I drink too much. I know that. Not massively in binges, but regularly like a couple of pints and a couple of big shots (whiskey or rum or vodka + a mixer) every evening. It's my excuse for relaxation and it really helps to deal with the wife and kids and the general end-of-day de-stress, or as I see it anyway. It makes me feel relaxed, to forget about the S-H-I-T.

But of course it's just a distraction. The buzz is not real and so the continual need to do this is a barrier to moving on and a barrier to improving myself and my life.

I need to stop drinking. I want to stop drinking. But I don't know if I can do it because it's part of my routine and I'm used to having a drink every evening. And frankly I really enjoy it.

So how can I do this? How can I get over the need for a drink every evening? Won't life be ever so difficult, stressful and boring without it?

chopper
30th December 2016, 20:09
I took up a hobby which left me with no money left over for alcohol without having to go into the higher rate tax band...

greenlake
30th December 2016, 20:12
I drink too much. I know that.

I need to stop drinking. I want to stop drinking.

So how can I do this? How can I get over the need for a drink every evening?

It's a dilemma for sure....

http://i.imgur.com/VGXPfcp.jpg

mudskipper
30th December 2016, 20:13
I drink too much. I know that. Not massively in binges, but regularly like a couple of pints and a couple of big shots (whiskey or rum or vodka + a mixer) every evening. It's my excuse for relaxation and it really helps to deal with the wife and kids and the general end-of-day de-stress, or as I see it anyway. It makes me feel relaxed, to forget about the S-H-I-T.

But of course it's just a distraction. The buzz is not real and so the continual need to do this is a barrier to moving on and a barrier to improving myself and my life.

I need to stop drinking. I want to stop drinking. But I don't know if I can do it because it's part of my routine and I'm used to having a drink every evening. And frankly I really enjoy it.

So how can I do this? How can I get over the need for a drink every evening? Won't life be ever so difficult, stressful and boring without it?

Generally I find after a couple of days off the booze I can take it or leave it. So it's a case of white knuckling through those first two or three days. A shocking 2-day hangover helps :) (I am currently posting with G&T in hand, but with good intentions of giving "dry January" a go...)

I find carbonated water a good substitute. I sometimes go for ginless tonic too (if G&T is your thing). And go to bed early so you're not tempted to pour a nightcap :)

SlipTheJab
30th December 2016, 20:16
Maybe consider substituting the booze for say Crystal Meth?

RSoles
30th December 2016, 20:55
Well, substitution is an idea as part of the drinking problem is its habituation.
For the odd occasions I've had to give up drink, I've used something like ice lollies, at least to get over the first couple of days. Thereafter it's easy (IME).

Also, there's no half-ways; one drink leads to 'just one more'.....

SlipTheJab
30th December 2016, 20:59
Well, substitution is an idea as part of the drinking problem is its habituation.
For the odd occasions I've had to give up drink, I've used something like ice lollies, at least to get over the first couple of days. Thereafter it's easy (IME).

Also, there's no half-ways; one drink leads to 'just one more'.....

+1 I was alluding to exactly that, I'm going to try and do the same, the only thing stopping me shifting the 2 stone i need to get back to my fighting weight is booze (and the crap eating that ensues once you've had a couple of large ones).

PurpleGorilla
30th December 2016, 21:17
I drink too much. I know that. Not massively in binges, but regularly like a couple of pints and a couple of big shots (whiskey or rum or vodka + a mixer) every evening.

That's too much, too often. Go for a run, lift some weights, shoot some terrorists on the playstation; but lay off the booze.

NotAllThere
30th December 2016, 21:21
You have to want to stop for yourself, not for anyone else.

Of course there are self-help groups - abstinence like AA, or some that advocate limits. Some people don't like AA (for example) because of the 12-step religious-ish program, but if your goal is to stop entirely and it works for you, why not? I know atheists who've been quite comfortable in AA.

I used to drink heavily, and then stopped entirely at age 41 for five years. I started drinking a few years ago, and was soon back to my former habits. However, something changed and now I just can't and don't want to drink like that. I had a 330ml beer at about 8pm this evening. I don't want any more. I sometimes have a nip of whisky - and I mean a nip - so a bottle of whiskey lasts ages. If I have to drive, I don't have any alcohol and don't feel I'm missing out.

It takes 3-4 days for any cravings to go away, and that's after recovery from your last hangover.

administrator
30th December 2016, 21:38
I think he's gone to fill up... Yup, kicking it for a good amount of time is relatively easy if you want to do it. But you do have to want to do it. When you see the weight start to come off and your head is that bit clearer it really does help to spur you on as well. I have been lucky this Xmas and had a stinker of a cold for most of it so haven't drunk half as much as I usually do at this time of year. I think mudskipper's advice is good too - go to bed at a decent time, I tend to do more damage to myself the longer I stay up :D

greenlake
30th December 2016, 21:45
When...your head is that bit clearer it really does help to spur you on...

http://i.imgur.com/txelKiN.jpg

vetran
30th December 2016, 22:40
I find a really nice cup of tea and something to do with your hands helps.

DannyF1966
30th December 2016, 22:53
Richard Hammond - Should I worry about ... drinking (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H44ic3CxUTU)

DannyF1966
30th December 2016, 22:54
I find a really nice cup of tea and something to do with your hands helps.

That's certainly one way to get banned from all the local boozers.

SueEllen
30th December 2016, 23:02
So how can I do this? How can I get over the need for a drink every evening? Won't life be ever so difficult, stressful and boring without it?

Take up a sport and be serious about it e.g. commit to doing competitions, recording your training. Then you will notice every time you drink your performance goes down.

Plus you should be more relaxed as well.

Edited to say: I actually drink more if I haven't committed to something e.g. a run or am injured, and I have family who have basically given up drinking due to the sports they do.

vetran
31st December 2016, 00:02
That's certainly one way to get banned from all the local boozers.

I think you are judging us as Bremainers not all of us play pocket pool.

Fronttoback
31st December 2016, 01:42
I drink too much. I know that. Not massively in binges, but regularly like a couple of pints and a couple of big shots (whiskey or rum or vodka + a mixer) every evening. It's my excuse for relaxation and it really helps to deal with the wife and kids and the general end-of-day de-stress, or as I see it anyway. It makes me feel relaxed, to forget about the S-H-I-T.

But of course it's just a distraction. The buzz is not real and so the continual need to do this is a barrier to moving on and a barrier to improving myself and my life.

I need to stop drinking. I want to stop drinking. But I don't know if I can do it because it's part of my routine and I'm used to having a drink every evening. And frankly I really enjoy it.

So how can I do this? How can I get over the need for a drink every evening? Won't life be ever so difficult, stressful and boring without it?

This quantity of alcohol is not excessive. If you can maintain these levels and maybe introduce a few 5km runs per week, it seems an ideal intake to me.

DieScum
31st December 2016, 03:41
I'm coming up to my one year anniversary of no drinking. I tended to binge to relax/numb the pain of everyday existence. Friday night would be a couple of bottles of wine and then a hangover the next day. During the week I'd sometimes drink a whole bottle in a night.

I decided to stop because the hangovers meant that I wasn't spending quality time with my young daughter the next day and, frankly, it was a stupid way of destressing.

I found it reasonably straight forward. I've moved away from the mates I grew up with. I live in Australia now so there's no catching up with an old friend over 10 pints.

If you're just drinking at home then you'll need to knuckle down for a month or so and then, hopefully, it's just a new routine after that.

The hardest part I've found are social occasions where everyone is drinking polite, respectable amounts and you're sitting there with a fizzy water looking like a berk.

Giving it up has certainly been positive. It's not some amazing nirvana but it's been good. Not sure if I will start drinking again ever actually. Having a couple of glasses is just boring for me and with a family now and not being 21 having a couple of bottles kills the next day. So I think I'd prefer to just have none.

I just need to test it
31st December 2016, 06:21
I was in a similar place to the OP. My drinking was routine rather than excessive. But by being routine it no longer felt like a treat to have a couple of beers.

So now I restrict my drinking to Fri/Sat/Sun evenings. I will drink as much as I want on those nights but curiously I rarely find I want more than one or two

BrilloPad
31st December 2016, 07:14
6 years now with little drinking. Alcohol is a depressant anyway. I rarely miss it.

Smoking I gave up 28 years ago and I still miss it. Evil stuff. Good luck!

ChimpMaster
31st December 2016, 10:31
Interesting comments there and nice to see many others here having had similar thoughts/experiences.

The social aspect is a big one for me. My friends are drinkers. My cousins are drinkers. So pretty much every single social occasion involves drinking to some degree - not so much the heavy sessions (I'm in my 40s now so can't deal with it :D) but perhaps 3 or 4 pints or a few glasses of wine etc. I can't imagine sitting there with fizz water all night. And personally, having seen non-drinkers in a group, they tend to be ridiculously boring ... and you just know there's something dodgy about them :eyes

Isn't this the hardest part of giving up or at least drastically cutting down booze?

And of course I'm going to miss that lovely feeling one gets from that first drink of the evening, which makes you feel rewarded and alive and valued and important and intelligent and creative and humourous and loved.

DieScum
31st December 2016, 11:07
Yeah, social part is hard. Sounds like you don't need to stop that though just the drinking every night at home.

Everyone is different. I used to really enjoy it but give it up for a bit and you'll soon get over it (well I did anyway, I know it's more complex than that). Just need to get yourself in a new routine.

SueEllen
31st December 2016, 11:58
The hardest part I've found are social occasions where everyone is drinking polite, respectable amounts and you're sitting there with a fizzy water looking like a berk.


Drinking and driving makes you a berk
If you don't want to drink, but can drive and park then do so.

MarillionFan
31st December 2016, 11:59
I don't trust any man who doesn't drink or knock his missus about.

quackhandle
31st December 2016, 12:14
Thankfully never been a big drinker, even when I was at Uni. I do love a few bourbons now and again however this is usually with the wife only half a dozen times a year.

Never liked the sickness when drunk, in fact the last time I did that was the Miracle of Istanbul - 5 times! ;o)

Getting into running 15 years ago has really helped me, I'm very lucky as I know it's not for every one. However I have to enter a race or I won't bother, I'm very lazy.

When I'm training, there is zero alcohol.

To the OP, seriously, good luck, hope you find a solution.

qh

NotAllThere
31st December 2016, 13:29
Yeah, social part is hard...The only thing I found difficult was deciding what to drink. I settled on tonic water. When you say "sorry, don't drink", most people respect that. Some even admire it. They certainly admire the lift home afterwards!

When I started drinking again, one of my heavy drinking colleagues was quite disappointed - he'd been telling his mates how much he admire this guy who doesn't drink, yet still socialises. I felt a bit bad about that.


I don't trust any man who doesn't drink or knock his missus about.That's because you're worried that if your wife meets such a man, she'll leave you in an instant.

vetran
31st December 2016, 14:20
As I said a mug of tea, if I'm designated driver and at somebodies home that & coffee does me fine. In a pub its a pint of Diet coke with ice & Slice.

I may have half a glass of wine with Dinner.

If you are feeling ill or rough in the morning after drinking 2 pints of water over the night will normally stop that though you do pee a lot.

MarillionFan
31st December 2016, 14:26
That's because you're worried that if your wife meets such a man, she'll leave you in an instant.

Bring 'em round. Best New Years present ever.

vetran
31st December 2016, 14:49
Bring 'em round. Best New Years present ever.

how is Mrs MF? Feeling better hopefully.

MarillionFan
31st December 2016, 15:27
how is Mrs MF? Feeling better hopefully.

$3 Million dollars worth of life insurance, but yet she still hangs on. :mad:

shaunbhoy
31st December 2016, 15:38
I took up a hobby which left me with no money left over for alcohol

You mean you got married? :tongue

scooterscot
31st December 2016, 15:38
I drink too much. I know that. Not massively in binges, but regularly like a couple of pints and a couple of big shots (whiskey or rum or vodka + a mixer) every evening.


Jeepers.. Sounds like dependancy rather than quantity. Should give your liver a couple of days rest at least.

Father to two young ones and a self inflicted work load I'm all too aware the need for distraction.

Just stop for a week, don't make excuses. You'll feel mahousifily better.

jmo21
31st December 2016, 17:05
don't make excuses

This.

Dealing with similar trying to lose weight.

If you don't want to do it, it won't happen.

jmo21
31st December 2016, 17:08
Interesting comments there and nice to see many others here having had similar thoughts/experiences.

The social aspect is a big one for me. My friends are drinkers. My cousins are drinkers. So pretty much every single social occasion involves drinking to some degree - not so much the heavy sessions (I'm in my 40s now so can't deal with it :D) but perhaps 3 or 4 pints or a few glasses of wine etc. I can't imagine sitting there with fizz water all night. And personally, having seen non-drinkers in a group, they tend to be ridiculously boring ... and you just know there's something dodgy about them :eyes

Isn't this the hardest part of giving up or at least drastically cutting down booze?


Cut out the mid week every night drinking, and enjoy the sociable drink with friends.

Fronttoback
31st December 2016, 17:14
Just make a rule to never drink two days on the trot.

Simples.

SueEllen
31st December 2016, 17:20
Just make a rule to never drink two days on the trot.

Simples.

And then you have two birthdays in a row or such thing.

Unless you have an excuse not to drink e.g. you have to run, cycle etc in the morning then it's unlikely to work.

Fronttoback
31st December 2016, 18:34
And then you have two birthdays in a row or such thing.

Unless you have an excuse not to drink e.g. you have to run, cycle etc in the morning then it's unlikely to work.

Self discipline. Creating distractions will only get you so far. To be a drinker in control comes from self discipline, not distractions.

greenlake
31st December 2016, 18:38
Cut out the mid week every night drinking, and enjoy the sociable drink with friends.

But....

http://i.imgur.com/pXoHQ0A.jpg

shaunbhoy
31st December 2016, 18:44
I try to have at least as many non-drinking days as drinking days. I mainly try and drink on fridays and saturdays with maybe one night during the week too. You are never far away from the next beer/wine/scotch and having lime & soda or filter coffee/green tea evenings is actually quite enjoyable too.
So is the distinct absence of hangovers (which I seem to suffer quite badly from!!)

NotAllThere
31st December 2016, 18:55
Self discipline. Creating distractions will only get you so far. To be a drinker in control comes from self discipline, not distractions.And how do you get the self discipline?

shaunbhoy
31st December 2016, 18:59
And how do you get the self discipline?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23M8WT_PS7E

:wink

Fronttoback
31st December 2016, 19:22
And how do you get the self discipline?

That's a good question. I was brought up that way. I don't know if you can learn that later if it's missing in your character by adulthood.

SlipTheJab
31st December 2016, 19:40
I try to have at least as many non-drinking days as drinking days. I mainly try and drink on fridays and saturdays with maybe one night during the week too. You are never far away from the next beer/wine/scotch and having lime & soda or filter coffee/green tea evenings is actually quite enjoyable too.
So is the distinct absence of hangovers (which I seem to suffer quite badly from!!)

Aah yes the liquid version of the 5, 2 diet :D

shaunbhoy
31st December 2016, 19:57
Aah yes the liquid version of the 5, 2 diet :D

Pretty much, yes. :smile

ChimpMaster
20th April 2017, 09:26
I drink too much. I know that. Not massively in binges, but regularly like a couple of pints and a couple of big shots (whiskey or rum or vodka + a mixer) every evening. It's my excuse for relaxation and it really helps to deal with the wife and kids and the general end-of-day de-stress, or as I see it anyway. It makes me feel relaxed, to forget about the S-H-I-T.

But of course it's just a distraction. The buzz is not real and so the continual need to do this is a barrier to moving on and a barrier to improving myself and my life.

I need to stop drinking. I want to stop drinking. But I don't know if I can do it because it's part of my routine and I'm used to having a drink every evening. And frankly I really enjoy it.

So how can I do this? How can I get over the need for a drink every evening? Won't life be ever so difficult, stressful and boring without it?

3.5 months without booze. Not a drop. Though I had a sniff of my mate's whiskey in a bar once.

I made it until April 15th and then had 3.5 pints of lager to celebrate.

Big Blue Plymouth
20th April 2017, 09:56
3.5 months without booze. Not a drop. Though I had a sniff of my mate's whiskey in a bar once.

I made it until April 15th and then had 3.5 pints of lager to celebrate.

Well done!

Sure you deserved it. Did you lose much weight?

I'm going on a 3 month dry period myself.

Been a heavy few months for me for various reasons & Sunday night I let off steam big time.

I never want to feel like that again....

ChimpMaster
20th April 2017, 10:05
Well done!

Sure you deserved it. Did you lose much weight?
About 2 inches off my waist and 6 Kgs but I'm only ~65Kg anyway.

I'm going on a 3 month dry period myself.
Sounds like something painful a woman might go through!! But good luck :)

Been a heavy few months for me for various reasons & Sunday night I let off steam big time.

I never want to feel like that again....
It can be done and is well worth it but the first month or 2 was hard for me, so be prepared to go through the pain and the constant whining questions of drinkers who can't understand why you're not drinking :laugh Oh and don't stop socializing else you'll feel like you're missing out.


Good Luck!