Tony 'opportunist' Blair has announced his return to parliament with the intention of becoming the first ever British black Prime Minster for real. When questioned by a sceptical media as to why he does not look particularly black, grinned: "I am the New Black. The first 3 letters of my name is always been black. The whole Labour party is New Black, please vote for us init", before proceeding to play gangster rap on his guitar. "I have always been bla, k, k, k" he strummed and jived. A Conservative party spokesman said the Tories were in the process of electing a new black shadow Prime Minster bro, adding "Yo mama Blair has no rhythm". Meanwhile the Liberal democrats announced that both main parties were unreal and that they had always been half-cast and were already juiced to elect a new shadow cabinet bitch. On hearing of Blair's return, a bemused Barrack Obama is reported to have said: "I do not understand a word of what any of these gentlemen are saying".
- Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
- Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!
Blair is b(l)ack
Collapse
X
- Home
- News & Features
- First Timers
- IR35 / S660 / BN66
- Employee Benefit Trusts
- Agency Workers Regulations
- MSC Legislation
- Limited Companies
- Dividends
- Umbrella Company
- VAT / Flat Rate VAT
- Job News & Guides
- Money News & Guides
- Guide to Contracts
- Successful Contracting
- Contracting Overseas
- Contractor Calculators
- MVL
- Contractor Expenses
Advertisers
Contractor Services
CUK News
- Streamline Your Retirement with iSIPP: A Solution for Contractor Pensions Sep 1 09:13
- Making the most of pension lump sums: overview for contractors Sep 1 08:36
- Umbrella company tribunal cases are opening up; are your wages subject to unlawful deductions, too? Aug 31 08:38
- Contractors, relabelling 'labour' as 'services' to appear 'fully contracted out' won't dupe IR35 inspectors Aug 31 08:30
- How often does HMRC check tax returns? Aug 30 08:27
- Work-life balance as an IT contractor: 5 top tips from a tech recruiter Aug 30 08:20
- Autumn Statement 2023 tipped to prioritise mental health, in a boost for UK workplaces Aug 29 08:33
- Final reminder for contractors to respond to the umbrella consultation (closing today) Aug 29 08:09
- Top 5 most in demand cyber security contract roles Aug 25 08:38
- Changes to the right to request flexible working are incoming, but how will contractors be affected? Aug 24 08:25
Comment