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zeitghost
19th June 2005, 15:48
Mine was the Hillman Imp (actually Singer Chamois) that managed to engage two gears at the same time...

amcdonald
19th June 2005, 16:35
First car was an Austin Metro, more accurately described as a rust bucket on wheels.

Luckily mine was stolen,then the police found it and thankfully some Chav's stole it from the police compound.

dazza12
19th June 2005, 16:47
I've got 2 worst owned - Ford Sierra and Ford Orion.

Never seemed to make it to the next MoT.

sappatz
19th June 2005, 18:29
a renault 18 (when a student). never started in cold weather

FRENCH CARS @#รจ! (the last part is censored)

Exploding Goat
20th June 2005, 03:05
Skoda. It cost twenty-two pounds and I was ripped off.

Board Game Geek
20th June 2005, 06:10
After passing my driving test, I was bequeathed this monster from my father. Of course, as a 17 year old and desperate to set out on the road, it was a dream come true.

It was the sports version, which meant it had a sunroof. It was also bright yellow.

A week after passing my test, I was driving on my own in Inner London, as a parcel courier for my dad's company :eek

Best training I ever did though !

Anyway, back to the car.

The most memorable incident was when a friend (Brian) and I went for a spin one day, down to Leeds Castle. It was a cold March day, I seem to recall.

Halfway to Leed's Castle, Brian said :

"I can't see out of the passenger's window properly. Can you get the wipers going and clean the screen ?"

So I did. I pressed the button to squirt water on the screen, and out came a jet of water. I took my finger off the button, but the jet continued. It kept coming for about the next 3 miles. Of course, I had to have the wipers on furiously to at least see where I was going. Then the passenger wiper threw itself from the car.

Deciding that we might as well continue the journey, and get a replacement later in the day, we carried on, somewhat bemused.

Brian had another request soon afterwards.

"Can you turn the heating on please, I'm cold."

I flipped the lever to the "Hot" position and switched on the fan.

10 mins later, the car was sufficiently warm, and Brian asked for it to be turned off.

I duly obliged, at which point the slider came off in my hand.

5 mins later, we were starting to roast.

I advised Brian to open the window.

He started unwinding the window with the manual handle...and it came off in his hand.

I tried to open the sunroof, but it too decided to divest itself from its handle.

By this time we were both in hysterical fits of laughter.

Brian called the car "a clown's car". The car, in a fit of vengeance, decided to have it's revenge.

BOING!

Brian's seat went fully back, and he was left in a permanent recline for the rest of the journey.

He never said another word after that.

I continued driving, giggling like a demon on helium.

Darren at 1st Accountancy Serv Ltd
20th June 2005, 08:51
Renault 19, had 2 french cars in total, will never have another...best sticking to German engineering!

zeitghost
20th June 2005, 10:14
Oh, I forgot.

The 2nd worst car was the Fiat Marea 2.0HLX I owned for 6 weeks last year.

Could have been used to provide a smoke screen on convoys across the Atlantic when the sump had oil in it... other than that, a very nice car.

DimPrawn
20th June 2005, 10:58
My 2nd Lamborghini was terrible, but the ones after that have been great. Which was nice.

Threaded.

threaded
20th June 2005, 11:07
DimPrawn: Actually all my Lambos have been pretty good. My 2nd one is doing a car show in Germany at the moment.

planetit
20th June 2005, 11:11
Interview question.

If a man buys a Lamborghini to compensate for having a small penis, what affliction causes him to buy two?

SupremeSpod
20th June 2005, 11:11
My 2nd one is doing a car show in Germany at the moment.

Time for your medication Jules!

threaded
20th June 2005, 11:27
planetit: I've bought more than 2 in my car buying life. I actually think they are quite a nice car.

Board Game Geek
20th June 2005, 11:45
I agree

BigJohnE
20th June 2005, 11:45
Austin A 40 (tempory car, had to tie the door to keep it closed.)

Fiat 124 (rusty cra9)

Fiat 126 (even more rusty)

Renault 30 (only 12 miles per gallon)

Mercedes Benz 600 Pullman (1966) (8 miles per gallon)

Mordac
20th June 2005, 13:39
Skoda. It cost twenty-two pounds and I was ripped off.

I think that's about fair for a full tank of petrol...;)


Mine was a Fiat - kept breaking down. A close second was a battered old Montego, which was rubbish, but didn't break down so often.

hattra
20th June 2005, 14:03
Vauxhall Chevette, or Shovit, as we called it, cos that's all we ever seemed to do with it. Regularly used to drive it from London to Poole, and get the AA to bring it back for us

Second worst - Austin Allegro ("all agro") - forced on me by a well-meaning parent - even when it worked OK, it was still one of the worst-looking cars around

OwlHoot
20th June 2005, 17:23
> If a man buys a Lamborghini to compensate for having a small penis, what affliction causes him to buy two?

There's some "Extreme Body Modifications" website (BME something?) with pics that might answer this. Think bananas split down the middle :x

sappatz
20th June 2005, 19:03
is a large penis provided as accessory with the lamborghini ? viva la dolce vita !

threaded
20th June 2005, 19:09
sappatz: You do get some luggage. On the last one I got a rather nice laptop bag, no good for the laptop as it is a little too small, but for carrying odds and sods when on the bike it is quite useful.

EternalOptimist
20th June 2005, 20:04
I once owned this F1 thingy. f kin sh!te tyres. couldnt run on a michelin - f kin sh1te.
yanks used to throw full beer cans at me, f kin sh!te it was.

anyway - better than gettin f kin champagne sprayed over me fkin sh1te that was.

Ruebans

8)

xoggoth
20th June 2005, 20:08
I had a car once. Crap. Real men drive VANS.

DimPrawn
20th June 2005, 21:07
Cars will be banned. They are evil fast and some people get pleasure from them, which is not "fair" to those who can't afford them.

The future is the bus!